The scared sign in baby sign language is made by holding both fists in front of your body with palms facing inward, then quickly flicking your fingers open while raising your shoulders””mimicking the natural startle response when something frightens you. Pair this with a scared facial expression, which is essential for conveying meaning in sign language. When your baby wakes crying in the middle of the night and you cannot figure out why, this single sign can eventually give them the power to tell you that the shadow from the nightlight looks menacing, or that the sound of the furnace kicking on startled them. Teaching the scared sign matters because babies often fear things that seem completely harmless to adults. A loud blender, a toy that looks different in dim lighting, or an unfamiliar person’s laugh can trigger genuine distress that a baby has no way to explain.
Once you know what is causing their fear, you can either remove the trigger or help them work through it. This article covers the exact technique for making the sign, when and how to introduce it, the developmental timeline you can expect, common mistakes parents make, and how this sign fits into building your baby’s broader emotional vocabulary. The scared sign also serves a therapeutic function beyond pure communication. Research into child development suggests that simply naming an emotion””giving it a label””often reduces the intensity of that feeling. When your baby can sign “scared” and you respond with understanding, you are not just solving an immediate problem. You are teaching emotional regulation skills that will serve them for years.
Table of Contents
- How Do You Make the Scared Sign in Baby Sign Language?
- When to Start Teaching the Scared Sign to Your Baby
- Using the Scared Sign in Real-Life Situations
- Building an Emotional Vocabulary Beyond Scared
- Common Mistakes When Teaching the Scared Sign
- Variations and Regional Differences in the Scared Sign
- Long-Term Benefits of Teaching Emotion Signs Early
- Conclusion
How Do You Make the Scared Sign in Baby Sign Language?
The scared sign requires both hands working together in a quick, fluid motion. Start with both hands in loose fists, held at about chest height with your palms facing your body. Then flick your fingers open rapidly so your palms face outward with fingers spread wide. As you do this, raise your shoulders slightly in a shrugging motion. The whole gesture takes less than a second and looks like a physical representation of that jolt you feel when something startles you. Facial expression is not optional with this sign””it is part of the sign itself.
American Sign Language and baby sign language both rely heavily on facial cues to convey meaning and intensity. When you sign scared, widen your eyes, raise your eyebrows, and let your mouth drop open slightly. Your baby will pick up on these expressions before they master the hand movements, so exaggerating your face helps them understand what the sign means. One comparison worth noting: the scared sign differs from the sign for surprised, though both involve sudden hand movements. Surprised typically uses hands near the face with a more neutral or positive expression, while scared positions hands in front of the chest with a clearly distressed expression. If your baby learns both, context and facial expression will help you distinguish which emotion they are communicating.
When to Start Teaching the Scared Sign to Your Baby
The optimal window for introducing signs to babies is between four and six months old. At this age, babies are actively absorbing language even though they cannot produce it yet. They are watching your face intently, beginning to understand cause and effect, and forming neural connections around communication. Starting the scared sign during this period means it becomes familiar by the time they are developmentally ready to use it. However, if your baby is older than six months and you have not started signing, do not assume you have missed the window. Babies and toddlers remain highly receptive to sign language well into their second year.
The difference is that an eight-month-old might pick up signs within weeks rather than months, while a four-month-old needs more time to develop the motor control for reproduction. What matters more than starting age is consistency””using the sign every time a relevant situation arises. most babies begin signing back between six and nine months old, though individual variation is significant. Some babies sign their first word at five months, while others wait until after their first birthday despite consistent exposure. Motor development, temperament, and how often they see signs all play a role. If your baby is not signing scared by nine months, that does not indicate a problem. Keep using the sign in context, and watch for approximations””a baby’s version of a sign often looks different from the adult version.
Using the Scared Sign in Real-Life Situations
Context is everything when teaching emotional signs. The scared sign should appear when your baby is actually experiencing fear, not during calm practice sessions. If your baby startles at the vacuum cleaner, immediately sign scared while saying something like “That loud noise scared you.” Point toward the vacuum so they connect the sign with the source of their distress. This real-time pairing of sign, word, and experience creates the strongest learning. One specific example: imagine your toddler suddenly refuses to go into the bathroom. They cry and cling to you but cannot explain why.
If they know the scared sign, they might be able to tell you””and you might discover that the automatic air freshener that sprays every thirty minutes terrified them when it went off unexpectedly. Without the sign, you might spend days thinking they have developed a bathroom aversion when the solution is simply unplugging a device. The verbal component matters as much as the visual one. Always say the word while you sign it, using complete sentences rather than isolated words. “You’re feeling scared of that dog” works better than just saying “scared” because it models natural language patterns. Your baby is learning spoken language and sign language simultaneously, and full sentences support both.
Building an Emotional Vocabulary Beyond Scared
The scared sign works best as part of a broader set of emotion signs rather than in isolation. Consider teaching happy, sad, angry, and hurt alongside scared. This gives your baby a toolkit for expressing their internal state rather than just one option. When babies have multiple emotion signs available, their communication becomes more nuanced””they can distinguish between being scared of something and being sad about it. There is a tradeoff to consider here. Teaching many signs at once can dilute focus, while teaching signs one at a time is slower but more thorough.
A balanced approach works for most families: introduce two or three high-frequency signs first (usually more, milk, and all done), then add emotion signs once those basics are established. Scared fits well into a second wave of signing vocabulary. The benefit of emotional signs extends beyond the immediate communication value. Toddlers who can name their emotions tend to have an easier time regulating those emotions. When a child can sign “scared” and receive acknowledgment from a parent, the fear often diminishes naturally. They feel understood, which provides comfort even before you address the source of the fear.
Common Mistakes When Teaching the Scared Sign
The most frequent mistake parents make is inconsistency””using the sign sometimes but not others. If you sign scared when your baby startles at a loud noise but forget to sign it when they seem nervous about a new person, you are sending mixed signals about when the sign applies. Babies need repeated, consistent exposure to connect a sign with its meaning. Aim to use the sign every single time you observe fear in your baby, even when it seems minor. Another common error is expecting immediate results. Some parents use a sign for a few days, see no response, and conclude their baby is not ready or is not interested.
In reality, babies often understand signs weeks or months before they produce them. Your baby may recognize the scared sign and feel comforted by your understanding long before they can make the sign themselves. Keep using it through what feels like a non-responsive period. A more subtle mistake involves facial expression. Parents sometimes make the hand movement correctly but forget to include the scared face, or they use the sign while maintaining a calm, reassuring expression. This mismatch confuses babies because sign language communicates through face and hands together. If you sign scared while looking cheerful, your baby receives contradictory information.
Variations and Regional Differences in the Scared Sign
Like spoken language, sign language has dialects and variations. The scared sign described here comes from American Sign Language, which forms the basis for most baby sign language programs in the United States. If you are using British Sign Language resources or materials from another country, you might encounter a different version of the sign.
This is normal and does not indicate that one version is correct while another is wrong. What matters for baby sign language is consistency within your household. If both parents use the same sign for scared, and any caregivers or grandparents learn that same version, your baby will understand it regardless of whether it matches what another family uses. The goal is communication between you and your child, not standardization across all children everywhere.
Long-Term Benefits of Teaching Emotion Signs Early
Children who learn to identify and express emotions early tend to carry that skill forward into childhood and beyond. The scared sign is not just about the baby and toddler years””it is an introduction to emotional literacy that supports social development, relationship building, and self-regulation as children grow. Parents often report that teaching sign language changes their own behavior as much as their baby’s.
When you commit to watching for signs of fear and naming that emotion consistently, you become more attuned to your child’s internal experience. This attunement benefits your relationship regardless of whether your baby ever signs back. The scared sign, like all baby signs, is ultimately about connection and understanding between parent and child.
Conclusion
Teaching the scared sign gives your baby a tool for communicating one of the most distressing emotions they experience. The technique itself is simple””fists opening to spread fingers while shoulders raise and face shows fear””but using it consistently in real situations requires attention and practice. Start between four and six months, expect signing back between six and nine months, and remember that understanding comes before production.
The scared sign is most valuable as part of a broader emotional vocabulary. Pair it with signs for other feelings, always use spoken words alongside your signs, and stay consistent even when you do not see immediate results. Your baby is forming connections around communication and emotions that will serve them well beyond the age when they need signs to supplement speech.